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Did you notice I changed the name? This newsletter used to be mostly about my work. Now it’s mostly about me. Haha. No really. In future editions you’re going to find stories from all walks of my life, not just my work. Think: not-so-much a newsletter from a consulting company, but ideas and stories from ...read more

Angus King was just sworn into the United States Senate. Yeah Angus! He served as Maine’s Governor for 8 years and he is a fellow resident of Brunswick, Maine. He told Tom Brokaw of NBC news while strolling around Brunswick — just Angus, Mary and Tom strolling the streets — that he hoped to go ...read more

Yes, I’m a Quaker. Here’s what it means. Especially these days, especially in New England, it seems out of favor to talk about religion. Or to not have one. I’m often apologetic. “Well, Quakerism is about the most easy-going, liberal, non-conformist religion there is,” I find myself saying. Or, “Well, as a Quaker, you can ...read more

Philadelphia is the birthplace of the Declaration of Independence and the United States Constitution. And it is a national emblem for free speech. Yet here in Philadelphia at the annual convention of the National Speakers Association this week they had a contest for people to write a Declaration of Interdependence. And I won! Here’s what ...read more

Our Congress is currently debating HR 1, For the People Act. Advocates say the bill is the most consequential piece of voting legislation since the Voting Rights Act of 1965. I’m all for it. In my opinion it will strengthen our democracy in critical ways. It will help us get along with each other better, ...read more

I fly this flag because, well, I love how it looks on this old New England farmhouse. And, to show that I believe in our country more than I believe in my party or other ideals. Political parties and politicians represent thought trends; popular thinking. Yet strong countries and constitutions weather such trends and hold ...read more

In my world, “how to bridge divides” is the question of the day. One answer: don’t even try. Go around. Bridge closed; seek alternate route. Find other ways to connect. In her book High Conflict, Amanda Ripley explains “the magic ratio” of 5:1. It takes five positive interactions to prevent or overcome one bad interaction. ...read more

I’ve seen bad meeting facilitation result in SO MANY bad group decisions; decisions by governments and governing boards that leave out key points of view, that ignore relevant information, that decide too much too fast, that seem like a waste of time. Is there one leadership skill that’s higher leverage than all others? I’m thinking ...read more

Since 9/11 – 25 years ago today – I’ve noticed a trend in the United States and I don’t know what to make of it. The trend is that we are increasingly scared of enemies within; people right here in our homeland whom we’re encouraged to fear and think of as enemies. In addition to ...read more

People are responding in different ways to the changes afoot. Our federal government is changing. The climate is changing. Technology is changing. Many of us are not sure how to react, or who we’re supposed to be in this unsettling world. My reaction is to do more in person and less online. More in-person gatherings. ...read more

Since 2004 I have written and emailed 163 Good Group Tips to subscribers. Each one is a page. They are on all aspects of group dynamics. You can read them all here. Did you know that each Good Group Tip has a Bob Dylan lyric to go with it? Every Tuesday morning my friend Brian ...read more

Some folks have a boat. Some folks have a camp. I have a barn. I spend my vacation money at the lumber yard! I love it actually. Carpentry is such a nice change of pace for me. A different kind of thinking. In the first photo is the week-one-crew: Ezra and Porter just starting their ...read more

What makes me smile looking back on my day? It’s not the $5 I spent on a that new thing, or the $5 I saved with that special coupon; it’s the $5 that I gave to Tom the bottle guy. (Here in Maine we have a bottle law so people collect empties for money). When ...read more

I am trying to get this to as many young people as possible, not to be a jerk but to make a point. Here’s the point. If you don’t vote you have no business complaining about the government. In the last presidential election, just 49% of 18-24 year-olds voted. That’s pretty bad. This is your ...read more

After my book was published – Together We Decide, An Essential Guide for Making Good Group Decisions – I hosted a free online Webinar to explain how I wrote the book and to take questions from viewers. If you want to focus on the little history of how I wrote the book, that begins at ...read more

It’s easy to be right, in my head. It’s easy to pretend I’m more perfect than I really am; more perfect than you. It’s harder to be wrong, with grace. The measure of integrity is not how right someone is, but how they handle when they’re wrong. We all make mistakes, including you. I know ...read more

When I’m the facilitator or leader, I end almost every meeting with Closing Comments. I write this into the agenda and make time for it on the spot. I ask each person to share a highlight from the meeting, perhaps a take-away, or perhaps a hope going forward. This is different from “meeting evaluation.” I encourage ...read more

Find the One You Need The Tips are useful for all types of groups facing all types of challenges. There are so many, the first trick is to find the one you need! 1. Type some keywords about your challenge into the “Search Tips, Videos, and Handouts” box at the bottom left of every page. ...read more

HWCFR: How Would Craig Freshley Rephrase? This bracelet was made by a client and provided to their staff. Very flattering! It refers to an exercise that I have done with them a few times. It’s often not helpful to say what you are really thinking. What MIGHT you like to say to someone…..but really shouldn’t? ...read more

“Let’s just get everyone in a room and talk about it.” There’s something magic about that, even in this age of magic technology that allows us to talk through screens and collaborate through platforms from places unknown. Indeed, in sharp relief to the alternatives, the in-person meeting is perhaps more magical today than ever. People ...read more

Recently a Good Group Tips reader contacted me asking how to reckon with an “informality” culture in meetings. Here’s his question and my response.   Question I’m a big proponent of structure in group decision making. In my job and my community I serve in various leadership roles on committees and boards. In many circumstances, the leaders ...read more

I know it’s the information age, yet I declare that information is over-rated and that Google is a show stopper. Information in abundance seems like an unconditionally good thing, but I’m not buying it. Our knee-jerk efforts to seek and provide information often shut down conversations and cheapen relationships. Here are three examples. I was ...read more

This is my first question when I walk into a room or join a group. Yours too. Before I do or say anything, I’m wondering about THIS. Because the answer to THIS QUESTION determines everything about how I act and what I say. When I’m in the role of meeting facilitator, my very first job ...read more

  At a time of isolation and screens, setting up a neighborhood Little Free Library has been a joy. The kids were grateful to have a project. And the parents were grateful for the kids to have a project! We ordered a kit from the nonprofit organization called Little Free Library. Step one: prime all ...read more

This phrase has been around since medieval times. I first heard it in Quaker meeting. To me it means that when you have lots of people helping, it’s easier for each person. And more fun. I choose to think of “light” as less burden AND more positive. Last weekend I helped out the Farmyard Jam, ...read more

On Thursday I took Mom to the Freeport Town Hall and she registered to vote. The Town Clerk, Christine Wolfe, was so nice and helpful to my mom. She welcomed her to the town as a new voter. Then Mom voted and we went on our way. That’s her in the picture. Mom doesn’t watch ...read more

I think humans have a genetic defect that might do us in. Our brains are too big. Not only do our heavy heads cause innumerable muscular/skeletal challenges, we think too much. I have this defect. Recall my recent article where I said that job of the heart is to pump blood, the job of the ...read more

I live and work on land that is a homeland for the Wabanaki, taken by settlers from away. I honor with gratitude the native people before me and among me. This is my land acknowledgement. The short version is the two sentences above. The long version is a brief telling of some local notive history, ...read more

World peace is a nice idea, but when news of conflicts from around the world are so abundant on my screens I can find myself drowning in despair. I’ve learned some simple tricks to help me foster peace in a battle-torn world. First of all, the world is not my responsibility. Of course people are ...read more

A few days ago I went to a talk at the University of Southern Maine by Dr. Eboo Patel called Strengthening Democracy Through Pluralism. Here’s what I learned. Eboo Patel is a terrific speaker. And he likes the Grateful Dead. It was super-fun to hear his band analogies; how the Grateful Dead are a model ...read more

Right before heading into an important meeting or conversation, I try to do three things: Plan my notes. If I hear something note-worthy, where will I write it down? I usually have two plans for that. 1. I have in my pocket a couple business cards and a Swiss Army Knife pen. Really. It’s called ...read more

Dick Barringer was my mentor in graduate school. He got me an internship at the Maine State Planning Office that led to a job that led to a career. He believed in me. I know that because he told me, all the time, every time he saw me. He introduced me to others as a ...read more

On a scale of 1-5 how was it, and why? That’s it. After a meeting, event, program, activity, or anything that you want feedback on, ask each person to answer the above question. It’s deliberately open-ended. You can answer this with positives or negatives. You are pushed to say the magnitude of your positivity or ...read more

There’s so much to love about libraries. They are magic civic spaces. In a consumer society, libraries are more special than ever. Did you know that a public library is one of the few places where you can: Hang out and not be expected to buy anything Interact with a human being (your friendly librarian) ...read more

I’ve been reading this book – The Courage to be Disliked – and want to tell you some things that I learned from it; and related things I’ve learned over the years. Out of ten people, 1 will dislike you, 2 will like you, and the other 7 will be meh. Why do we focus ...read more

In this post, Craig analyzes this popular video about being a first follower. And he tells the story of his own first follower: Jim. And there's even a bit about Taylor Swift.

The job of the heart is to pump blood. The job of the lungs is to suck air. The job of the brain is to make thoughts. The lungs and the heart work ALL the time and never turn off. Same. The brain never stops making thoughts. That’s it’s job. This can be hard to ...read more

In the recent Facilitation Workshop, a question came up about how to handle nervousness. “I’m a wreck before the meeting,” she said. For me it’s planning and preparation. Sounds simple – and certainly common sense – but it’s often the simple common sense stuff that works. Whenever I have to facilitate a meeting I prepare ...read more

If you want to know what today’s teenagers think about gender and artificial intelligence, you might treat yourself to this 30-minute podcast. Wait. Hold on. If you want to know what THREE TEENAGERS think, treat yourself to this podcast. When I talked with Dylan, Nika, and Wyatt on the radio last week, I learned that not ...read more

Thanks to all who commented on the value of facilitation during our International Facilitation Week online conversation. We held a random drawing from among all those who submitted comments and the winner of Craig’s books was Julie Allaire. Congrats, Julie! We heard lots of great comments and stories about how facilitators can really help groups – and ...read more

When there’s a strong difference of opinion among two parties, having a third party who works for both sides can be hugely helpful. Scuffle on the street? It’s a third party who often breaks it up; not trying to take a side but simply stop the fight. Row between two friends? It’s often that third ...read more

Here’s an unsolicited letter we received regarding a meeting facilitation project.   And here’s an unsolicited email we received regarding our Good Group Tips. Mr. Freshley, I’m writing to thank you for taking time to share your wisdom and expertise in the form of Good Group Tips.  Without exception I find them insightful, compassionate and ...read more

I recently ran a meeting specifically for people age 16-24 to ask them their views of the world and what they wish adults better understood about their generation. The few adults in the room were sworn to silence; there to listen. The young people in the room said some things that broke my heart. Here’s ...read more

Consensus decision making has a bad reputation for being process-heavy, confusing, inefficient, and frustrating. It’s a very idealistic notion, rarely attainable. Perhaps that’s why I’m so attracted to it! Haha. I joined a cohousing community that makes decisions by consensus. I chaired a Waldorf school board that makes decisions by consensus. I’m often hired by ...read more

I remember the first conference I was in when I heard one. A guy at the start explained how the land beneath our very feet was once inhabited by Indigenous people – he named the tribes – and he explained that the land had been taken. Wow, I thought to myself. That’s pretty rad. Turns ...read more

Question: I was on Maine Calling last week and Jennifer Rooks asked me: “Craig I think everyone has had a situation where we’re chatting with someone – maybe it’s a neighbor or we’re at a party – and the person says something that surprises you, that you disagree with, that you find unkind. What do ...read more

Some of you know I have a daughter who lives in Belgium. Did you know that she recently had a daughter? And that my granddaughter is a dual citizen? The baby is both American and Belgian. Trying to be the clever granddad, I wrote to the parents: “Who’s the baby gonna cheer for?” My son-in-law ...read more

I’ve met Pearce Godwin a couple times at conferences and was on a webinar with him last week hosted by NCDD. He’s our nation’s leading expert in talking across divides, in my opinion. He told us that if you are a political lefty and you want the attention of a righty, consider modifying your approach ...read more